What He Wants
by Naoshiro
Summary: Shuri wanted Mikage. But how will the young Oak deal with a certain battle sklave that's in the way? Or is Teito really in the way...? Shuri-centric fic. Mostly ShuTei with some MikaShu, but MikaShu happens first. Rated M for later chapters.
1. An Arrogant Person's Thoughts

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

So this 07-Ghost fanfic is Shuri-centric, focusing mostly on his relationships with Mikage and Teito. This will eventually lead to shounen-ai, then to yaoi. Probably. Depends on how I'll be handling the flow of the fanfic. XD So if you don't like fanfics about guys who like guys, then don't read this fanfic. I'm cool with it. But I apologize if any of the characters, especially Shuri, might seem out of character.

Shuri Oak needs more love and fans in my opinion, despite being the spoiled arrogant brat that he is. I somehow became a Shuri fangirl after the latest 07-Ghost chapters (somewhere later than chapter 70 but earlier than chapter 80). :3  
><strong>_<strong>

**Chapter 1 – An Arrogant Person's Thoughts**

With his bright blue-eyes shining with self-centeredness and an equal amount of confidence, Shuri Oak walked down the halls feeling like a king. He had a small group of guys following behind him, all whom he thought were inferior to him in looks, status, skills, and academics. Oh, they weren't even his _real _friends. Shuri knew that those sons of lower class families only stuck around him because he was an Oak. He accepted this fact shortly after seeing them approach him, only when they found out he was the son of the famous field marshal, Wakaba Oak.

Shuri felt no real satisfaction from having them as friends, save for the morale and ego-boosting compliments they give him every now and then. They probably do it to get on Shuri's good side. Besides, the young Oak was afraid to be left alone if his male supporters suddenly leave. He didn't want to be tagged as a loner.

Shuri can admit to himself that he was a spoiled brat and an arrogant person who needed to hear words of praise or encouragement from people who think highly of him. It was mostly just to keep him motivated in military school, so Shuri thinks there was a need to keep those guys around.

_'But who __**wouldn't**__ be motivated after hearing people's compliments?' _Shuri smugly smiled at the thought, entering one of the Barsburg Military Academy's classrooms early with him being tailed by his male companions. It was still a bit early before the start of Officer Lloyd's class on military tactics and strategies, so Shuri sat down at his usual seat in front and propped his left elbow up on the table with the side of his head resting against his left fist. Shuri closed his eyes after announcing to his friends that he'll take a power nap before class starts. His friends asked no further questions, carrying on with talking about both famous and infamous people present in the military academy.

In truth, the power nap was just an excuse to escape to the depths of his mind just to think. Believe it or not, Shuri is capable of thinking, as opposed to what some twofaced cadets from other classes say when the young Oak is not looking.

Shuri takes the time to think of what he is, who he is, what he has, what he wants, and what he needs. He does this in order to keep track of his life. It keeps him sane, as well as helps him remember his priorities.

_'What am I? I am a tall and handsome young blond boy with a thin and slightly muscular build. About the same size as Mikage, though admittedly I am just a little bit smaller.  
><em>_  
>'Who am I? I am Shuri Oak, heir to the honourable Oak Family and master of the Celestine family of stewards. Which includes Mikage.<em>

_'What do I have? I have the looks, the money, the fame, the power, the intellect, the influence, the confidence, a father I consider to be a god because he gives me everything I want, a mother, and a family of stewards that do my bidding. Mikage included. Sort of. Well, I don't think I have Mikage completely._

_'What do I want? I want to surpass Teito Klein, who is one of the reasons why I don't have Mikage by my side. Mikage's supposed to be __**my**__ steward. __**My**__ friend. __**I**__ am Mikage's childhood friend. Well, __**"was"**__seems to be the more appropriate term…'_

Shuri bit his lip as his eyebrows were knitted.

_'I can't believe I'm losing Mikage to a mere battle sklave. A puny one at that. But… Everything that those two have, I want it all. But those couldn't be bought with money.' _Shuri thought.

_'And lastly… What do I need? … I need to hear Mikage compliment me. Even just once.'_

Shuri wouldn't dare tell another soul about this, but he secretly wished to hear Mikage Celestine complimenting him. Praising him. Telling him things he wanted to hear. Shuri could command Mikage to compliment him if he wanted to, the scar-faced young boy being a servant of the Oaks and all. But it wouldn't be real or genuine if it wasn't Mikage saying it of his own accord. Even just one honest line from Mikage that didn't involve insulting him would complete Shuri even just for a day. It's what he needed. It's what he _wanted_.

"—ri. Shuri Oak!" A deep voice so oddly familiar tried to wake him up from his little "power nap".

The blond's blue eyes fluttered open to find that Officer Lloyd was standing in front of him, staring at him coldly. The voice that roused him from his nap was his teacher's.

"We can't have the field marshal's son sleeping in class, now can we?" the teacher's cold gaze didn't soften at all. Lloyd turned his back to Shuri and stepped onto the raised platform to write the current lesson's important points on the blackboard.

Shuri cursed inwardly at his male friends for not waking him up before their teacher arrived.

**-chapter 1 end-**

Chapter 2 shall come soon. Maybe. Depends on when I have time to write again. XD Please feel free to comment or review. :3


	2. Frustration

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

**Note: **So yeah, I gave Shuri's three friends names. I'm not really sure what their real names are, but meh. They'll be rarely mentioned [maybe 3-4 times in every chapter they'll appear in], so I guess it is fine to make up names for them. XD

**Warning: **Light swearing. About one word or so. Just felt like giving a warning about it even if it isn't that serious. XD

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2 – Frustration<strong>

Once class had ended, Shuri immediately got up from his seat and proceeded to walk out of the room. His male companions quickly followed him on his way out. He passed in front of the first row of seats before turning left by the corner of the last seat whose occupant hadn't stood up or left yet. The last seat belonged to a brown-haired short boy with big green eyes that made him look younger than he really was. _'Teito Klein,' _the name echoed in Shuri's head.

Those cold and emotionless emerald eyes watched Shuri just as Shuri's electric blue orbs looked back at them. Shuri felt like he was staring into a dead green abyss. The young Oak wondered how Mikage could stand being looked upon by the eyes of Chairman Miroku's lifeless puppet. Shuri gritted his teeth and stopped walking, letting his companions get ahead of him a bit before looking back to see why the Oak stopped.

"What are _you _looking at, _sklave_?" Shuri glared as he asked with more venom in his voice than when he usually derided Teito. The unsmiling sklave with furrowed brows stood up slowly with his hands lightly gripping the edges of the table in front of his seat.

"Nothing," Teito responded with a lifeless tone, turning his gaze away from Shuri.

At the corner of his eye, Shuri could see that Mikage stood abruptly from his seat on the second row with a slightly angry look on his face. The brown-eyed boy was probably expecting that Shuri would verbally abuse his friend again. Before Mikage could make his way to Teito, Shuri walked off with his friends. He didn't want to meet Mikage's eyes that seemed to see only Teito.

Going out of the room and into the hallway, Shuri walked faster, effectively overtaking his companions. Shuri felt agitated for no reason, especially after recalling how emotionless Teito looked.

'_Mikage chose to befriend that lifeless puppet instead of me.' _Shuri thought as he clenched his fists.

"—ri?" Someone was calling his name, but Shuri was too absorbed in his thoughts to pay attention.

_'I… I'm the one who deserves Mikage. If it wasn't for me, he—'_

"—wait up!" Another voice shouted.

'—_he wouldn't even be studying here. If he hadn't studied in this academy, he wouldn't have met Teito. We wouldn't have had our friendship broken…'_

"—ri, slow down!" A third voice called out to him.

'_But I don't understand… Why exactly am I so frustrated with those two. A proud Oak doesn't get jealous over a steward and a sklave but—'_

"SHURI!" The three voices shouted in unison.

'—_it hurts.'_

"OW!" Shuri exclaimed after someone suddenly gripped his shoulder hard enough to stop him from walking too fast. And it did hurt literally, no shit about that. He looked behind him and saw that his friends looked a bit tired. It turns out that Shuri was walking so fast with his long legs that his male companions caught up by switching between jogging and briskly walking after him.

"What's gotten into you? You're not mad, are you?" one named Aizawa, who had been the one to grip his shoulder painfully, asked.

"Sorry we didn't wake you up, Shuri," another one of his friends named Ootsuka said.

"We tried to, but it seemed like you wouldn't wake up. Then Lloyd-sensei came and… Well… Yeah…" the third and last one named Ikutsuki scratched his head.

Shuri was slightly taken aback. It was the first time the young Oak saw his friends' concern for him. Aizawa saw Shuri's widened eyes which he mistook as a sign of the Oak not wanting to be touched. He hastily withdrew his hand from Shuri's shoulder.

"… It's fine, guys. Forget about it. It's the sklave I'm bothered about," Shuri said with discomfort apparent on his face.

His friends, glad that they weren't the real cause of his discomfort, sighed in relief.

"Don't worry, Shuri. The small part you missed while you were taking a nap is easy to understand." Ootsuka smiled widely at Shuri.

"Luckily, Lloyd-sensei's lecture has only lasted about five minutes or so before he woke you up himself." Ikutsuki looked at his watch hidden in his left sleeve as he said so.

"You'll get higher marks than Teito Klein on Lloyd-sensei's next exam for sure." Aizawa beamed.

Their reassurance brought the usual arrogant Shuri back momentarily.

"Of course I will! I can't let him breeze through the exam just because he's Chairman Miroku's pet." Shuri declared as he swelled with pride.

"Oh and… Thanks. For the encouragement, I mean." Shuri managed to smile warmly at his friends, genuinely thankful for their words.

The three blushed slightly, seeing as this was the first time Shuri ever looked at them that way. And Shuri actually looked beautiful as he smiled, too. The three thought the young Oak was feeling okay now that he started to gloat about how he'll be at the top of the class by the end of the next exam. They knew that they had their old egotistical Shuri back, and they were content.

* * *

><p>Later that night, after having dinner with his friends, Shuri went back to his dormitory room. Shuri had felt uncomfortable again after seeing Mikage and Teito at the dining hall, but decided to hide his feelings behind his usual smug smile so as not to worry his friends. Shuri had been stealing glances from a table far from the two. The scar-faced blond looked happy watching Teito eat porridge, and Shuri couldn't fathom how watching someone eat such a plain dish could bring happiness.<p>

Shuri stopped in front of an automatic metal door which hissed open as he faced it. After he walked in, the door closed shut behind him. He turned the lights on, revealing a clean and simple but spacious room that had two study tables, two wooden chairs, a bedside table, two wardrobes, a bunk bed, a rectangular full body mirror on the wall, and a door leading to a bathroom. The only expensive piece of furniture was a black velvet chaise longue just in front of the mirror. Shuri had asked for more lavish furniture, but the field marshal saw no need for his son to possess such items in the confines of the military academy. Wakaba Oak only went as far as to hire a maid that is tasked to come in every afternoon while his son is in class to take care of the cleaning and the laundry so Shuri wouldn't have to do them.

Wakaba Oak had given his son that room to stay in with a friend he wanted to share it with, but Shuri kept it to himself. Or rather, Shuri wanted Mikage to share the room with him, yet he couldn't ask because Mikage was clearly happy sharing the much larger but more crowded room with Teito and the rest of the boys in their unit.

He growled in frustration upon realizing that all he had in his mind that day was Mikage, Mikage, Mikage. With a sprinkling of Teito the sklave, he might add.

He set his red stud earrings down on the bedside table, careful not to let them drop. Shuri then angrily kicked his boots off to one side and threw his uniform to the floor. He removed his boxers and shivered a bit after having the cool air come in contact with his naked body. Shuri had intended to take a shower to cool his head before studying everything covered by the earlier class's lecture. Hopefully that shower would also wash away his thoughts of those two.

**-chapter 2 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>… I think some people might be wondering why Teito hasn't gotten much attention yet in these first two chapters. He _will_ get a bigger role in this fanfic soon. I guarantee that. I wouldn't have said that this fanfic was "mostly ShuTei with some MikaShu" without getting Teito some action. XD Oh, and the next chapter is undoubtedly a **yaoi** chapter. You have been warned~ :3


	3. Remembering the Past (Part 1)

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

And I'm back after a very long hiatus [but I'd probably go on hiatus again for who knows how long]. I can't say I'm happy to be back, since I just discovered that all my fanfiction files have been erased from my computer. So I lost the copy of Chapter 3. I had to start from scratch for this one. OTL

Well enough of my pointless hiatus-related babble. I think I've kept some people waiting too long.

**Note: **The italicized portions separated by horizontal lines are flashbacks.

**Warning: **This chapter contains ambiguous drunken stupor.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3 - Remembering The Past (Part 1)<strong>

And he was wrong.

Amidst the cloying scent of the soap specially imported from District One filling the humid atmosphere of the bathroom, even after he had hoped that he wouldn't think about Mikage, thoughts of his past with the said steward lingered about in Shuri's mind as he absentmindedly rubbed the fragrant and slippery little bar on the surface of his exposed moist skin.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sometime past 10pm. The night before the students were expected to leave their homes to attend their first day of class at Barsburg Military Academy.<strong>_

_Many aristocrats from different districts as well as some high-ranking military officers from Barsburg Military Academy had been invited to the posh evening party at Oak Manor. Wakaba Oak thought Shuri would like to make a good impression on the people he'd be facing in the near future. Good for forging connections with people in high places, and good for upholding the Oak family's proud name. But getting Shuri on their good side wasn't Wakaba's main purpose. Shuri's father had arranged a party in order to congratulate him for getting into the academy. Wakaba was a military official, yes, but a father first and foremost. And as a father, Wakaba sincerely wanted to celebrate for his son was going to leave for the prestigious military academy the following day._

_Shuri kept his composure as he casually walked through the ballroom, nodding his head politely to those guests whose eyes he felt lock onto his white tuxedo-clad form for any longer than a second. He's long had his fill of gourmet food available at the party, and he wasn't so interested in both the aged crimson wine in the fragile crystal flute his slender digits held on to gracefully and plenty of the guests whose fake smiles Shuri assumed were used in order to maintain a measure of civility and respect towards the host family that had invited them to the party. He knew they were fake smiles because he smiled the same way towards other people he feels he's forced to be diplomatic to._

_Shuri wanted to retire to his bedroom early. Tomorrow was the big day, and he wanted to rest up for it. But that would be after he pays a visit to Mikage in order to congratulate him on his being accepted into the military academy too._

_Mikage was the first student in the history of Barsburg Military Academy to ever come from a family of servants. The first, because usual enrolees were, at the very least, middle class, or battle sklaves handpicked by authorized high-ranking military officers that deemed those with exceptional abilities worthy of being sponsored by the academy. Tuition fee was high, and even middle class families had a bit of trouble paying the price in order to train their sons to be soldiers that would serve the Barsburg Empire. Seeing that Mikage was not a battle sklave nor part of a middle class family, much less a higher class one like the Oak Family is, Shuri was determined to get him enrolled into the academy. Anything not to be separated from his childhood friend. And the first person the blue-eyed blond approached for that was his father._

_Wakaba Oak wasn't against the idea of Mikage entering the academy. In fact, he encouraged it, truly glad that Shuri thought of enrolling the enthusiastic servant into the academy. The man had considered Mikage to be a diamond in the rough, having watched the servant grow up alongside his precious son and observed their physical and mental states. He would have liked to see how the brown-eyed boy would turn out as a soldier with that seemingly boundless amount of energy, that fearless look in his bright eyes, and eager smile that made the older Oak think that the boy would love to surpass any challenge thrown at him with that air of youthful confidence. More importantly, Wakaba thought of his son's welfare and considered it better for Shuri to have company like Mikage around. He was well aware of Shuri's attachment to the servant, the two having been friends for as long as all the people in the Oak Family's manor can remember. Shuri was quite thankful that his father had agreed to his idea. The tuition fee was a small matter to a wealthy family like the Oaks, and Mikage could always take the spare uniform Shuri's mother insisted be bought for her son in case the young Oak suddenly grew just a bit in size._

_Wakaba Oak himself had told Mikage of his decision, with Shuri standing nearby while smiling from ear to ear in his own smug way as he observed the bewildered but happy look on the servant's face. Mikage had bowed and thanked Shuri's father most ardently, but then Wakaba directed the young Celestine's attention to his son, saying that it was all Shuri's idea. Which was true. "Hey, didn't we always dream of becoming soldiers as kids?" That was all Shuri could reply. Shuri had only kept that smug smile on his face as he watched Mikage slowly rising from his bowing position to stare into his blue eyes with that honest and wide grin on his bright face._

_In any case, Shuri had finally made his way through the sea of reasonably fashionably-dressed people in the ballroom, walking through one of the many carpeted hallways in the manor. From all those days of visiting Mikage's room in order to invite the young Celestine to hang out with him, he didn't need to think of where to turn or which door to stop at. It's like his feet already had the location of Mikage's room memorized. It was sort of a lengthy walk to the hallway where the servant rooms were. Shuri had to walk through the long hallway where the guest rooms are, descend a flight of stairs, and pass through two corridors to get there._

_The young Oak always hated the journey to Mikage's room but tolerated it because of the destination. And why did he hate it? At least one room emanated sounds of intense lovemaking when he passed through the hallway where the guest rooms are. He shuddered, trying not to think of the shameless acts people behind those doors were doing. It always made him feel like the mansion he lived in was being turned into a whorehouse. Shuri had thought the guests to be so wanton as to not muffle the lewd moans and groans they were making._

_And that was why, at that precise moment, he held a champagne flute in his hands. It was nice of his father to permit him to drink just for tonight, although Shuri had no plans to get himself wasted the night before the first day of school. That one glass of champagne was a good distraction to the boy all the same. Shuri downed the drink in one go to divert his attention from the sounds of sex while he briskly walked down the hall. He made a soft, satisfied sigh as he felt the liquid burn its way down his throat and warm his stomach. He licked his lips, the taste of bittersweet alcohol lingering on his tongue._

_He managed to get through the hallway without diverting his attention to whatever was happening behind those closed doors. As for the rest of the journey, it was quiet; most of the servants were either busy in the ballroom or cooking up more dishes in the kitchen, and Shuri hasn't encountered anyone on the way to Mikage's room._

_He finally arrived. Mikage's door was ajar, letting Shuri see and be seen by the people inside._

_Kohaku and Rinka, Mikage's younger siblings, both lay asleep in their pyjamas on Mikage's bed with two black tailcoats clumsily draped over them as blankets. The other three Celestines were seated around a small round table. Kokuyou, Mikage's older brother, and Mikage himself were out cold on their chairs, hands still clenching empty beer mugs. Their white dress shirts' first three buttons were unbuttoned. Kairen, Mikage's father, was still impeccably dressed in his normal butler attire as he silently sipped on very little beer he had left in his own mug. A box filled with empty beer mugs sat under the wooden table where the plates that once filled delicious food lay empty._

"_Good evening, Shuri-sama. What brings you here at this late hour?" Kairen asked, setting the mug down on the table littered with dirty plates and more empty mugs._

_Shuri took a few steps into Mikage's room before speaking. "I did come to congratulate Mikage on getting in the academy. But looks like he's really wasted." The whole Celestine family was dear to the young Oak. Watching them made him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Shuri looked tenderly at the four sleeping people, then faced their father who smiled back at him._

"_Mikage's just tired. Shuri-sama has been very kind to grant this opportunity to my son. I'm quite thankful for what you did." Kairen stood then bowed courtly._

_Shuri's cheeks coloured. "I-it's nothing," he coughed, diverting his attention to the small hawkzile model that hung from the ceiling above Mikage's bed. The sight of the hawkzile model warmed Shuri's heart; it was something he and Mikage built together as kids. They both loved to fly hawkziles, and they usually raced against each other in their leisure time._

_Kairen simply smiled, got up, and woke his children. He asked them to clean up the mess in Mikage's room so they could all get some rest. Kokuyou groaned as he stirred awake, grabbed his coat, and capably lifted the empty box of beer bottles out of the room while nodding to Shuri politely with a small grin. Rinka shoved Mikage's tailcoat off her, piled the plates one on top of the other, and followed Kohaku, who had his own stack of plates in hand, to the kitchen. Kairen politely asked Shuri for his empty champagne flute and made his way out with it along with a few of the mugs. Mikage took his time getting up from the chair, dropping the mug in his hand which thankfully did not break. Shuri was afraid that the next time the servant dropped another mug, there would be broken glass to clean up. Mikage attempted to grab the rest of the mugs, but Shuri stopped him._

"_Let me do it. You're drunk, and you'd probably just break these if I let you do it. I don't want Kairen to scold you right before your first day of class."_

"_Unnh…" Mikage groaned. "But Shuri, I'm not d-"_

"_No buts." Shuri didn't listen and simply grabbed all the remaining mugs by their handles, storming out of the room before Mikage could say anything further._

_Shuri got to the kitchen just in time to see Kairen leave. Kairen was surprised to see him be the one to bring the rest of the mugs to the kitchen for cleaning. Shuri saw him raise his eyebrows, as if to question the whereabouts of his son, so before Kairen could ask, the young Oak already spoke._

"_Mikage's dead drunk. I told him I'd bring these back since I'm afraid he's just drop them repeatedly on the way here. Father's not going to like his beer mugs getting damaged," Shuri held his head up high as he set the mugs down among the other dirty dishes next to the sink._

_Kairen sighed. "I'm very sorry about that, young master Shuri. It will not happen again."_

_Shuri just nodded and made his way back to his room. He loosened his white tie and removed his white coat, which he draped over one shoulder. He was almost to his room when he noticed something was wrong. His bedroom door was wide open, and the light from the hallway pouring into his room shone upon a discarded shoe lying on the soft carpeted floor. It was a black leather shoe that their butlers wore._

_Like any other normal teenager, Shuri did NOT appreciate people invading his room without permission._

_He boldly made his way inside, closed the door behind him, and dropped the coat from his shoulder onto the floor. Dim moonlight filtered through the translucent window curtains, but it was still hard to see. Shuri summoned a ring of zaiphon that circled about his hand. The blue glow of his zaiphon dimly lit up his room as his eyes scanned the area for the intruder. He found someone occupying his large bed and scowled. He went closer and turned on the bedside lamp on a bedside table. His blue eyes suddenly softened as he recognized the sleeping person._

"_Mikage," he sighed tiredly and massaged his throbbing forehead with his free hand. The servant slept with his back to Shuri._

"_Wake up. Go sleep in your own room," Shuri spoke, the zaiphon circling his hand disappearing. Mikage didn't even stir at the sound of his voice._

_Shuri leaned over and gripped him with one hand by the shoulder. He was about to shake him awake when Mikage's hand abruptly seized the former's wrist and pulled. Shuri didn't react fast enough and lost his balance, landing with his chest leaning on Mikage's side, his legs awkwardly hanging off the edge of the bed._

_The wind got knocked out of his lungs when he landed, and Shuri gasped as he tried to push himself off of Mikage with one free hand. Mikage wouldn't let go of Shuri's other hand no matter how much the latter struggled free. All Shuri managed to do was lift his torso off Mikage and swing his legs onto the bed in a kneeling position. Mikage's body lay sideways between Shuri's arms and legs, still calmly breathing. Shuri was starting to get peeved._

"_Mikage. Seriously. Let my hand go. Get off my bed and sleep in your room," Shuri glared at Mikage's sleeping face._

_The servant opened his eyes and grimaced, his voice a slurred sleepy tone. "Wha if I dun wanna leave?"_

_Shuri was stunned. _'Geez this guy's really drunk,'_ he thought._

"_This isn't funny, Mikage. You're drunk. Now get _out_ of my room."_

"_Ya know what's reaaaally funny, Shuri?" Mikage's grip tightened around Shuri's wrist. The young Oak sensed danger and stiffened._

"_That you actually think I'm drunk."_

**-chapter 3 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>So I lied about this chapter being a yaoi chapter. I didn't mean to lie since I originally planned for "Remembering the Past" to be one very long chapter. I only split it into two for easy viewing purposes. I promise that the next chapter has the yaoi part. Really. I'm not gonna lie.


	4. Remembering the Past (Part 2)

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

This chapter is the reason (or at least one of the reasons) why this fic is M-rated in the first place. It was an idea in my head that stewed for a year, and it's only now that I thought of typing it all down. So I'm still kind of apologetic about that absurdly long hiatus I took since I left something of my own creation unfinished. I hate the feeling of not being able to finish something. orz

And so, I feel like Mikage's drunkenness is a point of debate. But we can all agree that love can drive a person crazy enough to do things they don't usually do, right? Right.

**Note: **The italicized portions separated by horizontal lines are flashbacks. The non-italicized text in between those two apostrophe things are thoughts. Shuri's thoughts.

**Warning: **This chapter contains two guys having sex, ambiguous drunken stupor, and masturbation.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4 - Remembering the Past (Part 2)<strong>

_Mikage's stare was serious and piercing. Shuri can only be taken back. "What are you- Mmph!"_

_Raising his head, Mikage used his free hand, his left hand, to tilt Shuri's head and force it down, letting their lips meet. Mikage leaned back on his right elbow, pulling Shuri's hand even closer to his side._

'What…?'_ Shuri was shocked. _'The Mikage I know wouldn't do this!'

_The young Oak resisted, but the more he did so, Mikage tightened his grip at the back of his blond head. The kiss was getting rougher as Mikage continuously pressed his lips harshly against Shuri's own, occasionally biting it enough to sting but not bleed._

'But I can taste beer from his mouth… Is he really not drunk?'

_Shuri scrunched his eyes closed then opened his mouth to scream, but that proved to be a bad idea. Mikage stuck his tongue in Shuri's mouth, let it lick and rub against Shuri's tongue, and effectively muted the blue-eyed blond's screams to pathetic teary-eyed whimpers. Shuri's right arm was pinned between them, and his other extremities pounded helplessly against the bed. He still continued to try to wrench his hand free from Mikage's grip, but it was all a futile attempt._

_Struggling against Mikage was proving to be a waste of Shuri's energy, so he thought he had to find a perfect opportunity to stop Mikage's ministrations with the energy he had left. Shuri didn't want to seriously hurt Mikage._

'Wait…' _Shuri thought as he suddenly paused. Mikage didn't seem notice him stiffen as the onslaught of wet kisses continued._

'If I don't wish to hurt him… Does this mean I… I'd actually let him do this to me…?'_ As if to test the validity of this train of thought, Shuri tried to start honestly evaluating what he felt while Mikage kissed him._

_Now that he was fully conscious of the kiss as he didn't struggle anymore, the sensations seemed to multiply ten-fold. Shuri felt his chapped lips getting wet with their shared saliva. Mikage still tasted of beer as the brown-eyed boy's tongue lapped against his own wet muscle. He was also aware that his own tongue seemed to have started moving of its own accord, meeting with Mikage's tongue and moving tentatively against it. Now it seemed like Shuri was going along with the flow to see if he truly wanted to kiss Mikage this way. This made him pause and feel more confused._

'Why did I… Why did I do that?! He's my best friend!' _Shuri started to feel somewhat betrayed._

'Friends don't kiss this way… What about our friendship? Didn't it mean anything to him? How could he do this to me…?'

_Shuri opened his eyes. Mikage's brown eyes were the first things he saw. His best friend was looking into his blue orbs with such intensity. For a second Shuri thought that there was no mistaking that Mikage felt something for him._

'Does he… Does Mikage really love me? Or is he… Is he just drunk enough to do this with a guy like me…?'

_Though Shuri was still conflicted about the matter, he was very sure that he had to do _something_ in order for the brown-eyed boy to stop. Shuri shouldn't let this happen to him, especially not with this turbulent mix of emotions he was feeling. The confusion he felt only added to the pain in his heart caused by what he perceives as Mikage violating their friendship._

_Shuri first tried to summon zaiphon in his free hand, but Mikage kept harmlessly cancelling it out with his own zaiphon. Shuri tried biting Mikage's tongue to get him to pull away. It worked at first, since Mikage cringed and let his head fall back onto the pillow. Mikage's grip on Shuri's wrist faltered, and Shuri broke free from his hold, although his head still stayed locked in place._

_Shuri bore a painful expression. "Mikage… Why?! Why did you-"_

"_It's because I love you, okay? Shuri… I love you…" Mikage's eyes seemed to tear up as he let go of both Shuri's head and wrist, instead wrapping his arms around Shuri to embrace him and hold the blue-eyed boy close._

"_B-but… Our friendship… Mikage- Mmf!" Shuri's eyes widened as Mikage shoved him to one side of his bed in order to reverse their positions. Shuri's head hit the pillow as Mikage forced him into another kiss._

_Mikage spoke every time he pulled away for a quick breath. "I'm sorry. I-," he dove in for another kiss. Shuri could only moan against the kiss in protest as his hands clutched the bed sheets tightly._

"_I can't help it." He kissed Shuri's lips again._

"_You drive me crazy, Shuri. I try to resist, but-," Mikage pressed his lips against Shuri's cheek and nuzzled it._

_Shuri felt his face flush as he was treated this way. He knew this had to be stopped, dreading what would become of their friendship in the morning, but deep down he felt like he couldn't bring himself to tell Mikage to stop. Like Shuri wanted it to keep going._

'Do I really want this?'

"_Your blue eyes haunt my dreams, Shuri." Mikage pressed his lips softly against Shuri's jawbone. The soft gesture made Shuri heavy-lidded as he let out a small sigh._

"_I can't help but be drawn to you." Mikage looked directly into his blue eyes, and Shuri could see those brown eyes burn with such passion. Mikage seemed so serious, which made him wonder if the guy really was under the influence of alcohol or not._

_Shuri turned his head to face the bedside lamp just to avoid his gaze. "I… never really thought about you this way. We've been friends for so long." Shuri began to think about those times when they were kids._

'When we were kids, it was okay for us to sleep in the same bed if one or the other got scared of the stormy nights or bothered by nightmares…'

"_We don't have to end our friendship, Shuri."_

'…when we were kids, it was okay for us to fall asleep next to each other beneath the shade of one of the courtyard trees…'

_Shuri felt Mikage rest his head at the crook of his neck. His blond hair felt silky against Shuri's skin._

'…when we were kids, it was okay for Mikage to end up with his head on my shoulder, or my head on his shoulder, during the times we fall asleep together…'

"_Are you stupid? How can this _not _affect our friendship?" Shuri got irritated._

"_Then maybe… Just for tonight, will you let me make you feel my love?" Mikage's lips were so close to Shuri's neck that the blue-eyed blond could feel them move and quiver with every word the brown-eyed servant spoke. Shuri could feel Mikage's heart pounding through his clothes, and Mikage could probably feel the young Oak's heart racing too._

'This is a side of him I haven't seen before. It's not that I don't like this new side of him… I'm just… scared that the Mikage I knew for so long would never come back to me.'

'Just for tonight… Yeah…'_ Shuri closed his eyes and let Mikage touch him however the brown-eyed boy pleased. At the back of his mind he was starting to think that he was no better than the people he thought were making his mansion seem like a whorehouse with the way they made love so shamelessly loud even behind closed doors. Those thoughts were pushed away by Mikage pecking him on the lips._

"_You don't know how happy I am to be with you right now." Mikage crooned, nibbling on Shuri's ear. His hands were busy removing Shuri's clothes, starting from his necktie._

_Shuri felt the warmth next to his ear disappear so he opened his eyes. The sight of Mikage's concentrated expression greeted him as his white dress shirt got unbuttoned by deft fingers that were rough and calloused from hard work as opposed to Shuri's smooth and slender ones. Mikage glanced at Shuri, smiled serenely, and started to unbutton his own shirt. Shuri's eyes followed the servant's hands until Mikage reached the last button. Shuri's eyes wandered lower to see Mikage's pants, where there was an obvious tent._

_Shuri suddenly became bashful at the sight of his friend's erection and attempted to sit up, yet he ended up leaning back with his arms to support him as Mikage lowered his head to the blue-eyed boy's collarbone. Mikage's gentle kisses pacified him. He almost expected the servant to be rough, but was surprised by the overwhelming gentleness._

_The brown-eyed boy nipped and sucked at the pale flesh while one of his hands ran through Shuri's smooth blond hair and the other rubbed a nipple. Shuri shifted uncomfortably, biting his lip and closing his eyes at the new sensation of having his chest stimulated. He brought his hand down to rest on Shuri's arm and dipped his head to swipe his tongue against the other nipple, drawing a shudder from the boy beneath him._

"_M-Mikage…" Shuri whispered._

_The young Celestine grazed the nub lightly with his teeth, his hand pinching the other nipple at the same time. His mouth engulfed the pink knob as his tongue swivelled about the nipple._

_Mikage sat up as Shuri opened his eyes. The servant took their shoes, socks and pants off, leaving only their tented underwear on. The head of Mikage's penis already poked out of the waistband of his underwear. Shuri's cock stirred at the sight. Mikage cautiously slid Shuri's underwear off his legs, letting the hard organ bob free. The young Oak watched as his servant licked his digits provocatively. Mikage's fingers were slick with his saliva._

"_We don't have lube, so this'll hurt a bit." Shuri got flipped over to lie on one side of his face as Mikage raised his hips to expose the young Oak's ass. He felt Mikage spread his butt cheeks with one hand. The other hand inserted a slickened finger slowly through the ring of tight muscle._

* * *

><p>'<em>Uhn… Mikage…'<em>

Shuri stroked himself as he leaned against the tiled bathroom wall. This was the first time he got reduced to this state after reminiscing about their night together.

* * *

><p><em>To distract the young Oak from the addition of a second finger into his tight puckered hole, Mikage rubbed Shuri's stiff dick. He used the nail of his thumb to drag along the slit of the penis head, and the pad of his thumb to spread Shuri's pre-cum around the red head. He pumped the organ in time with his fingers thrusting into Shuri's hole to stretch him out.<em>

* * *

><p>Shuri rubbed the base of his cock with one hand as the other hand pumped the slick organ. He was starting to leak pre-cum and absentmindedly bucked his hips.<p>

* * *

><p><em>The third finger was inserted when Shuri started to whimper from the pain. Mikage didn't start thrusting the fingers in and out until he felt Shuri start to buck his hips to feel more of the young Celestine's hand against his dick. Mikage steadied Shuri's hips with the hand he used to jerk Shuri off before thrusting all three fingers in and out of the tight entrance. He stretched him out for a time before taking his underwear off. Mikage turned him over to lie on his back before he positioned himself to kneel in between Shuri's spread legs.<em>

_He was surprisingly larger and thicker than Shuri in comparison. Mikage used his hand sticky with Shuri's pre-cum to pump his erection, slicking it up in their mixed pre-cum. He guided his penis to Shuri's entrance, prodding the tight ring of muscle. Shuri braced himself, clutching at the sheets as Mikage started to insert himself inch by inch. Mikage would pause to ask if he was okay, and Shuri would simply nod his head ever so slightly. It was clear to Shuri that Mikage did not want to hurt him._

_Mikage began to rock his pelvis back and forth, and Shuri's pain turned into something else entirely. He felt a peculiar sort of bliss from becoming one with his best friend. The way their bodies seemed to meld together was a heart-racing new experience for Shuri. He thought that, maybe, coming to love Mikage wasn't impossible._

"_Shuri… Ah-! Nngh-! I- I love you! Shuri!" Mikage moaned loudly. Shuri could only moan as he watched Mikage's desperate expression. He was really trying to make Shuri feel good, and Shuri knew that._

_Shuri gripped his leaking cock and started stroking in time with the young Celestine's thrusts, both of them feeling close to release. They shouted as they came, Mikage riding out the remainder of his orgasm as Shuri lay limp and panting with his semen-spattered abdomen. The young Oak can feel Mikage's warm semen inside him._

* * *

><p>Shuri panted as he came into his hand and onto the wall. He gazed at the pearly liquid coating his fingers, and somehow felt a little bit of shame.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Mikage pulled out and lay beside him, pulling him close for a slow, sensual kiss. One that Shuri found he was returning. He felt Mikage leave his side and for a moment was scared that he'll leave. But Mikage only left briefly to retrieve a blanket to cover them both. Mikage turned the bedside lamp off and returned to holding Shuri securely in his arms.<em>

_Shuri looked up to meet his eyes and found his brown eyes staring back into his blue ones. Mikage had a brilliant smile on his face, one that made Shuri feel comfortable. He could feel Mikage oozing happiness from every pore of his milky honey-colored skin. Shuri sighed as he managed a small smile, falling asleep in Mikage's warm embrace._

_**The morning after…**_

_He felt his lips tingle, as well as his neck. Shuri stirred and opened his eyes slowly. Shuri woke up to find the sheets pulled off his naked body, and Mikage sat next to him, using healing zaiphon. His butt wasn't as sore now that Mikage was healing it with zaiphon. The tingling sensation he felt was the healing zaiphon taking the bruising away. Mikage was fully dressed, his dress shirt buttoned up properly. Shuri's white tuxedo was nowhere to be seen. His uniform for the day was already prepared and placed on a chair next to the bed._

"_I put the clothes in the laundry basket, prepared your uniform, and healed the physical body marks and areas I think were sore. I'm really not that good with healing zaiphon, but I guess this'll do for now. I'll get someone to prepare breakfast for you," Mikage said._

_Shuri noticed that the sun hasn't even come up. He felt the bed shift from displaced weight and felt Mikage's intention to leave. He caught Mikage by the sleeve as the brown-eyed boy sat up to get off the bed. "No, don't leave."_

_Mikage looked back, slightly shocked, but not altogether displeased. That was when Shuri realized what he had just said._

'What did I just- Why did I-'

_He saw that Mikage smiled tenderly and used his hand to gently remove Shuri's hand from the caught sleeve. "We can't let them know I was here last night. Thank you, Shuri, for everything." It took Mikage a few seconds before he finally, reluctantly, let go of Shuri's hand. The warmth of his hand still lingered in Shuri's own._

_Shuri watched him leave. The young Oak drew his knees to his chest and hugged them, feeling a weird emptiness in his heart._

_He managed to get off his bed and planned to wash himself. Shuri examined himself in the full-body mirror in his personal bathroom, seeing if there was really any physical evidence from last night. Mikage left no visible marks on his body, but the feeling of being taken by him marked Shuri so deeply in his mind. He had no difficulties walking, and Shuri was grateful that Mikage knew even a little bit of how to use healing zaiphon. He took a bath, lathering his body up with soap, conscious that Mikage touched him everywhere last night._

_A little later, once they dressed into their military uniforms and hauled out their luggage, the two boys travelled to the Barsburg Military Academy grounds in separate airships, and only got to meet each other a week after that night. But their meeting felt awkward on Shuri's side, at least. He and Mikage's eyes met as they walked past each other in one of the many hallways of the academy. A short green-eyed brunette walked close to Mikage's side. Mikage smiled at Shuri like he did before, as if nothing was wrong, and the blue-eyed boy returned it with an uneasy smile of his own. Shuri only learned it from his other friends that the brunette he saw with Mikage was Teito Klein. Mikage seemed to stick to Teito like glue, and Shuri felt pain in his chest. He felt thrown aside by Mikage. He felt lonely; Mikage didn't approach him of his own accord at all for the past week. It was like nothing happened between them._

'And to think it was Mikage who said we didn't have to end our friendship…'

_He silently hoped that Mikage was only acting like their first time never happened. Yet the mere fact that he wanted Mikage to remember that night continued to puzzle him so. Shuri can't deny that it meant something to him. It was his first kiss, his first time, and with his best friend._

* * *

><p>'<em>That encounter has never left my mind since then. All I did ever since was try to get his attention back without thinking of a legitimate reason for doing so. It's clear now… Why I'm so affected by his relationship with Teito…'<em>

Shuri washed the semen off the wall, his hand and his member with the water pouring out of the shower head above him.

_'… I've decided. I don't wanna lose him.'_

Shuri got out of the shower, dried himself, and put his bathrobe on.

_'I'm not gonna lose him to some battle sklave he recently met.'_

He raked his hand through his hair before preparing his uniform for tomorrow. His heart was lit with a fire of determination. He sensed a weight getting lifted from his heart, too, now that he knew how he felt for the young Celestine.

'_He'll always be the Mikage I know… the Mikage I love.'_

**-chapter 4 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>I hope you guys aren't disappointed by the yaoi. I'm still learning how to improve the erotic part of my writing style. o-o;

EDIT: Hoshit. I hate double negatives. OTL


	5. The Wrong Approach

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

So as you can see, I took parts of the anime dialog and put it in this fic. Not that I'm trying to be completely accurate or anything, since this _is _a fic and all.

**Note: **Ermergerd. Finally, Teito has dialog time. OTL

**Warning: **Just some swear words here and there, and some [awkward] sex talk.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5: The Wrong Approach<strong>

No matter what Shuri does, Mikage doesn't seem to want to talk to him. The young Oak asked himself, _'am I taking the wrong approach?'_

Every single time he attempts to say something nice to either Teito or Mikage, it comes out as an insult. He can't help it. Shuri knew he had to stop doing that and start talking to them normally, especially to Mikage, but habits are really hard to break. It's already been a couple of weeks since he decided to get Mikage back, and up until now he has this problem of directly saying what he wants, along with the problem of insulting people constantly. Shuri has serious issues.

Shuri continued to brood over his problems even while he was having dinner with his friends.

'_Congratulations. Shuri Motherfucking Oak has just won the title of __**The Biggest Douchebag Ever**__.'_ Shuri thought as he banged his head on the table, just a few millimeters away from hitting the edge of his plate. But that didn't stop his blond hair from touching the barbecue sauce drizzled all over the grilled pork dish. _'Now Mikage will never talk to me. I'm such an idiot.'_

"Psst. Ikutsuki. What's the matter with Shuri?" Ootsuka leaned over to whisper to the guy.

Ikutsuki also leaned in a bit closer to Ootsuka. "I don't know. He's been like this for weeks. I thought this was just a phase. I thought we could just leave this alone until it comes to pass."

Shuri could hear their whispers, but was too busy wallowing in self-pity to care.

Aizawa, unaware that Shuri could totally hear them fine, also joined in the whispering. "Maybe we're taking the wrong approach to this-"

"Like hell I'm not taking the wrong approach!" Shuri blurted out, raising his wide-eyed head. All three of his friends were confused. A few students looked up from their tables, but turned their heads away when they noticed it was just Shuri.

"Um, Shuri? Are you okay?" Aizawa asked.

"Fine." Shuri grumbled, cheeks red at the sudden embarrassing outburst.

Aizawa decided not to question why he was acting so strangely any further than that, and instead said "Hey Shuri, if you have any problems, you know you can talk to us about it." Ikutsuki and Ootsuka nodded their heads to affirm Aizawa's statement.

"Thanks, guys. Really. I'll be fine." Shuri managed a small smile.

"You should wash the sauce out of your hair though," Ootsuka commented.

Shuri patted his hair with his hand and saw the sticky sauce stain the white uniform glove he wore. He stood and excused himself from the table.

* * *

><p>Teito's eyes followed Shuri as he walked out of the cafeteria with barbecue sauce in his hair.<p>

"That guy… He's been weird lately." Teito said before drinking from a small box of milk through a straw.

"Who?" Mikage looked up from eating his yakisoba.

"Shuri." Teito said nonchalantly.

"… Why do you think so?" Mikage's face was surprisingly morose even if he was trying his best to be indifferent about the matter. He sipped on a glass of orange juice.

"He tries to pick on us more so than before. He's acting more strangely than usual. And he looks at you a lot lately."

Mikage did a spit take. He sprayed juice all over the table.

"Gross. Here." Teito held out tissues from the tissue dispenser on the table.

"Thanks," Mikage murmured, wiping his mouth and cleaning up the mess he made.

'_What was that all about?' _Teito briefly wondered if there was something going on between Mikage and Shuri.

* * *

><p>"You asleep yet, Teito?" Mikage whispered as the night patrol was far enough not to hear.<p>

"Nope…" Teito replied.

"We'll probably be put into different units once we join the army." Mikage commented.

"Yeah…"

"Be sure to write sometimes. You are kinda my best friend, after all." Mikage closed his eyes as he leaned against his pillow.

There was a moment of silence.

"You listening?" Mikage asked.

"…You heard about how I was a sklave before I came here, right?"

"What about it?" Mikage opened his eyes, wondering about the sudden topic change.

"Even though I was a sklave, I was just a battle sklave trained to fight until I die. Miroku's been taking care of me ever since I can remember. So I don't know anything about family or love. But I think having you as a best friend must be kinda like that." Teito rolled over to lie on his side.

Teito was surprised to find that Mikage looked up to face him with tears on his happy face.

"W-why are you crying?!" Teito was puzzled.

Mikage rubbed the tears away with the sleeve of his pyjama top. "You stupid idiot! What you said was so touching that I have no idea how to react. But this is the first time you've ever talked to me like this before, so I'm really happy."

Mikage slammed both his hands onto Teito's bed. "All right, then! Let's swear an oath of friendship before the big exam!" He held out his fist. Teito looked on in shock.

"I'll never abandon you when you're in trouble on the battlefield. I swear to God that when we die, we'll die together." Mikage words were firm.

'_If Mikage's willing to swear that, then I'll swear this to you!' _Teito bumped his fist against Mikage's fist.

'_God, for Mikage, I'd do anything!' _Teito swore determinedly.

Mikage's smile then slowly melted into a thin line.

"… There's something I want to talk to you about." Mikage's voice grew serious. He withdrew his fist and leaned on the railing of Teito's bed.

Teito blinked and looked on, setting his hand down and silently urging him to continue.

"It's about Shuri."

"Hm? What about that annoying guy?" Teito grimaced.

"Look, Teito, I know he can be annoying, self-absorbed and obnoxious sometimes-"

"Sometimes?" Teito lifted an eyebrow.

Mikage ignored his comment and continued talking. "-but he's a good guy-"

"Who are you, and what have you done with Mikage?" Teito crossed his arms.

"Hear me out, okay? You're my best friend and I feel like sharing something important with you here."

"… Go on." Teito listened intently.

"Shuri's not that bad a guy. I would know because I was a servant from his household. We're childhood friends."

"Then why does he pick on you? On _both_ of us?"

"I don't know about you, but I think he just doesn't like you."

"Good! Then the feeling's mutual." Teito sulked.

"Aw, c'mon. Don't be like that. I'm sure you and Shuri would get along fiiiiiiiine." Mikage paused. "Someday." Mikage scoffed.

"This isn't funny." Teito's eyes narrowed.

"I'm serious! Shuri's a great guy once you get to know him better. In my case…"

Teito hummed impatiently, wanting Mikage to get straight to the point.

"He picks on me to rile me up or to get my attention, even back when we were kids. I usually return his insults with some of my own. Most of the time it just means he wants to tell me something, but doesn't know how to."

"It's been about a year since he started picking on us, Mikage. Why couldn't he just walk up to you and tell whatever he has to say to you straight?"

"He just can't spit it out sometimes." Mikage shrugged.

"Try telling that to yourself." Teito murmured.

"Did you say something?" Looks like Mikage didn't hear it properly.

"Nothing… Then why don't you guys just talk so he'd stop this nonsense?"

"I can't." Mikage's expression was grim.

"Why not?"

"Do you even know how awkward it is for me to approach him at the current situation?" Mikage's hands started to tremble.

"I did something I probably shouldn't have… I'm afraid of what he wants to tell me. I really do want to talk to him, but I just can't. Even if I try to gather up some courage to do it, I always chicken out in the end." He averted his brown eyes and clenched his fists.

"What _did_ you do?" Teito dreaded to ask.

Mikage took a deep breath before speaking. "… All this time, I loved Shuri. Actually, I still do. I told him that the night before the first day of class. I drank a bit of beer with my family that night, so I guess the alcohol gave me the courage to confess, though I was perfectly aware of what I was doing. I wasn't really drunk… I kissed him and…"

"And…?"

"I had sex with him."

Teito gave him a surprised look that could have had a thousand meanings. His green eyes just widened, his mouth was agape, and his cheeks and ears were red.

"I-it was consensual!" Mikage stammered. "I mean, he let me do it. He didn't really try to stop me. Well at first he did _try _to stop me-"

Teito's tone was akin to a mother scolding her child. "Mikage! How could you do this to Shuri-"

Mikage couldn't stop his words. "-but then he kinda… Started to return my kisses and even moaned my name. He stroked his cock in front of me while I thrust into him." Mikage was blushing.

Teito paused, his mouth open. For a few seconds he ran out of things to say.

"He let me enter him." Mikage added before clamping his own mouth.

Teito grew pale and narrowed his eyes once again. "If you weren't my friend, I would have already told you that this is _way_ too much information and smacked you on the head for it."

"Heh, well, it's kinda difficult for me to let this out, but I know I have to. It's just that it's been bothering me for so long, and I trust that you'd listen to me and maybe tell me what I can do about it."

Teito took a moment to consider what he can ask and tell Mikage. "Do you regret what you did to him?"

"Shuri showed signs that he didn't completely dislike it, but…" Mikage's voice trailed off.

Teito knew he wasn't going to get a straight answer, so he tried again. "Well, what do you wanna do? I get that you want to confront him about this, but what do you expect to gain from doing so?"

"I don't know… Closure? He told me he treasured our friendship. What I did to him crossed the line…"

Teito watched Mikage's expressions closely. "Do you still want to be friends with him? Do you want to be _more_ than friends with him?"

"I love him. Of course I want to be more than friends with him, but if he doesn't want to love me back then I'll be completely happy to get back to what he and I had before _this_ happened." Mikage looked genuinely hurt.

"… Have you ever put yourself in his shoes?"

"… What?"

Teito sighed. "Did you ever think about what he felt that night, or what he felt after you refused to talk to him about this for so long? There has to be a reason why he kept doing this to us for so long."

Mikage hung his head. The answer to those questions was obviously a no.

"He's probably afraid of what you have to say too, Mikage. It's something both of you went through, so you guys should really talk this over with each other. You have to take the initiative to talk to him if he really can't spit it out."

"…You're right... But what if he starts hating me?" Mikage started to look more hurt. Teito was starting to see how Shuri deeply affected his best friend.

"It's just a 'what if'. You won't know for sure unless you guys start talking. But if he does start to hate you, then you reap what you sow. I think you'll have to man up and take responsibility for what you did."

"That's pretty good advice... Thanks, Teito." Mikage went back down to lie on his bed with a heavy heart.

* * *

><p>"Okay, it's finally time for your final exam! Please gather into your designated teams and enter your examination halls," said a female officer. "Dismissed! Good luck!"<p>

Military personnel have started shouting teams' names in order for the students to know when it becomes their turn to take the final examination.

"You kept me up too late and now I'm beat!" Mikage yawned.

"It's your own fault for being such a blabbermouth." Teito spat.

"I can't believe I'm on the same team as a sklave!" Shuri complained as he walked towards the two.

'_Oh man, I only wanted to say hello... Geez, why can't I stop?!' _Shuri mentally slapped himself.

"Don't think you'll be able to breeze through the exam just because you're Chairman Miroku's little pet!" Shuri tilted his head as he spoke, his friends staring mockingly at Teito from behind the young Oak.

'_What the hell am I doing?!' _On the inside, Shuri wanted to tear his hair out.

"Funny coming from a man who relies on his father's name." Mikage had yawned again, covering his mouth as he spoke. Teito wanted to elbow him as if to say, "I thought we talked about you and him getting to speak to each other normally?!", but couldn't. It would look too suspicious to Shuri.

"What was that?!" Shuri got peeved, and his male friends bore similar scowls on their faces.

Before anything else could happen, a female military officer shouted, "Team A, gather up! I suggest you do it while I'm still asking nicely!"

"Yes, ma'am!" the whole team, minus Teito, chorused.

"Let's hurry, Teito," said Mikage. They were trailing behind the rest of the team. Teito took that moment to speak quietly to him.

"Really, Mikage. I don't understand how you could love someone like Shuri. But I won't judge."

"Let's just say it's the power of love." Mikage chuckled.

"Ew, don't say such nauseating lovey-dovey things." Teito stuck his tongue out in disgust.

As their team entered the testing area, several members surveyed the place. Shuri followed Mikage to stand near his right side, and Teito stood near Shuri's right side.

"Whoa, whoa! What're they throwing us into?" Mikage asked.

"Dunno." Teito replied, keeping his eyes peeled.

"So then, everyone, here's your final exam!" the female officer said in a cheerful tone. She pulled a lever that lifted a gate holding off an incredibly tall and muscular gray-skinned balding man with chains around his hands and stitches all over his body. The chains were automatically removed as the iron gate was raised. He donned a red prisoner suit, wore a brown eye patch, and sported numerous piercings.

Officer Lloyd entered the testing area. The team then turned their attention to him.

"Your final exam is to defeat that criminal. In other words, kill him. Please kill him before he kills you. You'll fail if you abandon your allies or are unable to kill this man," he said.

The female officer chimed in, walking towards Officer Lloyd, saying "He really will kill you if you don't work together."

"What the hell?!" one person from their team reacted.

"You for real?!" another one exclaimed.

"But we've got Shuri on our side! This'll be easy!" Aizawa shouted.

"Man, the brats this year are rude!" said the criminal who took a moment to look at every team member. "Let's have some fun together!" he exclaimed.

"Well then, let the exam begin!" the female officer chirped as she stood next to Officer Lloyd, the door to the testing area hissing shut as the team got secured in the enormous glass dome that trapped them with the criminal.

"We'll do what we always do!" Shuri said, albeit a bit nervously.

"Then why're you slinking backwards, Shuri?" Mikage taunted him.

"Back off! Just you watch me, Teito Klein!" the smug smile was back on Shuri's face. He wanted to show him up in order to win Mikage's favor.

A student just got knocked flying to a wall by the criminal. The criminal did a quick backflip; he was surprisingly agile for his size.

"Quit dicking around!" said the criminal, smiling crazily. "My jail time gets cut down by defeating you lowly brats!" The criminal spun around and threw a punch in the direction of a few students, forcing them to jump out of the way. The unlucky few of those who did jump out of the way were punched aside in mid-air. Teito watched the criminal and noted his rapid movements.

Things were looking pretty grim. The team was falling apart, its members getting thrown to the walls one by one. Shuri looked outside the dome and saw high-ranking officers. In a moment of desperation, he pounded against the glass.

"Help us! He's gonna kill us!" the young Oak shouted.

He saw a tall scary-looking white-haired purple-eyed officer move his lips. He couldn't hear through the glass, but he knew there wasn't going to be any outside help coming for them as more people talked but didn't move from their spots. He continued to frantically bang his fist against the wall of the dome, especially after seeing Chairman Miroku approach the group of officers.

Shuri was aware that most of the team has fallen. Killed? Unconscious? Shuri didn't know. Teito and Mikage still stood strong. The criminal turned his attention to them, laughing, saying that it was their turn.

Shuri's admittedly pathetic cries for help attracted the attention of the criminal. He turned around to see the criminal pounce at him, ready to strike with a clenched fist. And to his surprise, Teito came to push him out of the way, in time for both of them to evade the powerful punch that made the floor crack and rocks fly off.

The young Oak, with his butt on the floor, watched as Teito came back to challenge the criminal. Mikage ran to Teito's aid, working with him in order to injure the criminal. They thought the criminal was sufficiently injured, but Mikage was caught off-guard. The criminal had him by the neck. Shuri was overwhelmed by the feeling of fear and dread.

"Mikage!" Teito shouted. The criminal dropped the boy as the green-eyed brunette attacked, not pausing for even a breath. The expression on his face was rage, and both Mikage and Shuri can only watch on.

Shuri looked over to where Mikage was and saw him say something he couldn't hear as the brown-eyed boy watched the battle sklave fight on. The young Oak could make out "Teito…" from the movement of his lips.

'_I'm pathetic,' _Shuri thought. _'I couldn't even protect Mikage…'_

Teito was able to restrain the criminal's movement using a zaiphon circle around the latter's neck.

'_Don't show any mercy, Teito. That could be seen as your main weakness!'_ Chairman Miroku's words echoed in Teito's head.

"Give up. I'll kill you if you move." Teito threatened him.

"I give up! Just don't hurt me," the criminal said.

"You can't end an exam like this! I believe I told you to kill him." Officer Lloyd said as the door to the testing area hissed open.

"He's not really our enemy." Teito declared. "There's no need to kill him…" He withdrew the circle of zaiphon, freeing the criminal. But as soon as he did so, a red-colored zaiphon buzzed into the room like a sonic wave and sliced the criminal's head off before Teito's eyes.

Teito looked in the direction of the door and saw three military officers, one of whom had his hand outstretched. The red zaiphon came from that white-haired purple-eyed man in the black elaborately-decorated uniform.

"You're soft," the man said, withdrawing his hand.

Teito glared at him, not knowing who he was.

* * *

><p>"Did you hear Teito? Including us, only 19 students passed." Mikage said, noting that the bunk beds surrounding theirs are all empty.<p>

Teito leaned back on a pillow with his hands behind his head. "Who was that guy that cast the zaiphon back there?"

"You mean Chief Ayanami?" Mikage massaged his bandaged right hand.

"Ayanami?"

"They say he's nuts! Who knows how many thousands of people he's killed!" Mikage's eyes were lit in amusement as he hoisted himself up to face Teito on his bed.

"But man, I'm pretty pathetic." Mikage frowned, facing away from Teito. "My hands are still trembling." He gazed at his injured hand.

He looked back at his best friend with a serious expression. "I'm really grateful to you, Teito. You saved my life. You saved Shuri's life, too. And we passed the exam."

"I'll never abandon you when you're in trouble on the battlefield." Teito said.

Mikage smiled. "And I'm proud of you for not finishing off that criminal, best friend!"

"Well, let's get to bed. Tomorrow we'll finally get to graduate!" Mikage said. He lay down in Teito's bed, facing away from him. "We'll finally be soldiers!"

"Hey! Don't tell me you're sleeping up here!" Teito complained.

"Lighten up! This is our last night together."

"Cut the crap! You probably said that to Shuri-" Teito realized what he just said and cupped his mouth, scrambling back until his back hit the metal bed railing.

"…That was low. Really low, Teito." Mikage's voice was sad, and he said it without turning around to face Teito.

The green-eyed brunette removed his hands from his mouth. "I'm sorry."

"You probably just went homophobic on me."

"No! I mean, I think that it's fine for a guy to like another guy. I don't think gender matters when it's love." Teito said, a bit embarrassed by what he said and how truthful he was when he said it. "I was just surprised, that's all."

"You're a pretty straightforward guy, man. Well, 'night, best friend." Mikage closed his eyes.

Teito breathed out a sigh of relief and stared at Mikage's back.

'_Shuri… huh. I never would've guessed.' _Teito thought. He lay down next to his best friend and got under the sheets, careful not to touch the sleeping Mikage.

**-chapter 5 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>Welp, there you go, guys. TV Tropes was right. Poor Communication Kills. And Mikage, TMI, man. TMI. I totally share Teito's sentiments about your openness. D:

I won't lie. I was totally tempted to do this:

**Teito:** Really, Mikage. I don't understand how you could love someone like Shuri. But I won't judge.

**Mikage:** Let's just say it's the power of **a yaoi fangirl crack-shipping!**

**Teito:** Ew, don't say such nauseating lovey-dovey things.


	6. Excuses

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 6: Excuses<strong>

Shuri had thought about confronting Mikage before the final exam, but he stopped himself, thinking that both of them wouldn't be able to concentrate for the task ahead of them if they talked about it then.

Shuri had thought about confronting Mikage after the final exam, but he stopped himself, thinking that the young Celestine must be pretty tired, especially after sustaining an injury to his arm. He thought he'd only embarrass himself more after the pathetic and cowardly display he had shown in the testing area.

Shuri had thought about confronting Mikage the day after, since it really was the last day they could be together in the same academy before getting assigned to their respective posts or positions in the military. Shuri, once again, stopped himself. The submission of requirements that day _was _a legitimately hectic day, with the students all around campus either packing their bags to go home because they weren't chosen, or travelling from one office to another with their papers in hand just so the legal stuff for their position transfers can be handled accordingly.

'_I'm such a coward… I keep making excuses not to show myself to Mikage…'_

Shuri sighed and straightened his back. "Tonight. Definitely. After I get my papers settled, I'll talk to Mikage and tell him how I feel." He walked on, papers in hand, towards his father's office.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Later that night, upon discovering that his best friend raised a hand against Ayanami, Mikage came to rescue Teito. He chanced upon Teito beating the guards into bloody pulp. Mikage resolved to help him however he could.<strong>_

"Stop it, Mikage! I don't want to drag you into this!" Teito, ironically, was being dragged away by Mikage.

"You idiot! You wanna die?! No one's ever survived challenging Ayanami!" Mikage didn't stop running, pulling Teito along.

"I stole a Hawkzile and left it up ahead! Now hurry!" Mikage urged him on.

"Mikage!" Teito continued to protest.

"Just run and try to stay alive! Don't you dare worry about anything else!" Mikage insisted.

'_God, if you're really there, I'm begging you to protect Mikage!' _Teito thought.

"There he is!" Looks like two guards found them escaping to a nearby balcony. "You two, freeze!" They blocked their path to the Hawkzile.

Teito and Mikage jumped over their heads and landed right next to the balcony railings. Mikage smirked, thinking that they outwitted the guards. He was then shocked when Teito held a knife against his throat.

"Get back!" Teito threatened the guards. "I'll kill this hostage if you get any closer!" The guards took the threat seriously and stepped back.

Now that they were out of earshot, Teito started to speak.

"Mikage, I can't let you become a criminal, too. I've gotta escape on my own."

"Teito…!"

"Mikage, we'll always be the best of friends, won't we?"

Mikage smiled. "You bet."

"Tell Shuri you love him, alright?"

"…I will. Now go, Teito!"

Teito did a backflip, falling off the balcony while shoving Mikage towards the two guards. He landed on the Hawkzile, and silently wished for his best friend's safety.

* * *

><p><em><strong>While Mikage was helping Teito trying to escape…<strong>_

Shuri paid a visit to the dorm rooms. Though the lights were on, no one was in sight. Just when he finally mustered the courage to go to the dorm rooms, the person he was looking for was no longer there.

'… _Guess I missed my chance. Tomorrow, surely. I'll definitely tell Mikage that I love him.'_

**-chapter 6 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>Teito, ohoho, you sly matchmaking dog. I see what you did there. XD And now for this matchmaking dog to start typing out a way for you and Shuri to end up in bed together- I mean, end up together. /SHOT


	7. Coping With Loss

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own 07-Ghost or the characters in that anime/manga. If I did, Mikage probably wouldn't have died so soon. (TT^TT)**

**Note: **The italicized text not encased in either quotation marks or apostrophes are supposed to function like those magical narrator voices that come from the ceiling.

**Warning: **Maybe some swearwords here and there.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 7: Coping With Loss<strong>

_**Several days later, the news about Mikage's death spread to Oak Manor. Shuri only heard of it when he overheard Kairen comforting his children about it. He went to his father's home office to confirm this.**_

He stormed into his father's office and stomped his way to the front of his father's desk. Wakaba Oak wasn't surprised to see Shuri like this.

"Mikage died in a hawkzile accident! Is this true?!" Shuri screamed, slamming his hands against his father's desk.

_Little did they know that Mikage __**didn't**__ die in a hawkzile accident._

"Shuri, calm down. Getting mad about this is helping nobody." Wakaba's expression was stern. Although he felt sympathy for his son upon his having lost a childhood friend, deaths happen every day, and, especially as a military man, deaths did not, do not, and probably never will faze him. The battlefield lets no one escape alive without a fight. He felt that Shuri should learn to accept and understand that.

Shuri took his father's reply as a yes.

"Where's the body?" he asked his father.

"…They couldn't bring the body back. It wasn't recovered." Wakaba's words rendered Shuri unable to speak.

"I'm sorry, Shuri." Wakaba picked up a pen and retrieved a letter from a pile of paperwork.

Shuri cradled his head in his arms as he shed tears. He ran out of his father's home office and let his legs take him somewhere else. He didn't care where. He just wanted to be alone someplace he felt was safe.

Wakaba had dreaded Shuri's reaction on his servant's death, which is why he never wanted to tell him about the details in the first place. But he knew there was no going around it. Now that his son knew, he figured he could leave Shuri alone for a while to cope with the loss. There was nothing he could do to ease the pain in Shuri's heart but help the Celestine family hold a proper funeral service. He called for Kairen in order to discuss the matters concerning the deceased Celestine's burial.

_And while Wakaba only thought that Shuri grieved over the loss of a friend, Shuri was really grieving over more than that. He mourned for the loss of someone he genuinely came to love as more than a friend._

The young Oak found himself entering Mikage's room and closing the door behind him. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he sat on Mikage's bed. Sunlight filtered in through the window. The sunny atmosphere did not alleviate the gloom and despair Shuri felt. It only reminded him of their childhood days, when he and Mikage would be playing out in the courtyard under a bright sunny sky.

He lay his head down on the pillow and scrambled under Mikage's sheets. They smelled the way Shuri remembered them to smell like whenever he slept with Mikage in this room as children. Shuri turned his gaze to the ceiling and saw the hawkzile model they built together. He remembered how hard they worked on it and how much time they spent in order to finish it. He can remember the gleeful expression on Mikage's face when Shuri offered for him to keep the finished model.

Shuri couldn't take it anymore and started to wail. At the time he didn't care if people in the mansion heard him. He was mourning the loss of someone so important to him, and that's all that mattered to him now. He needed to let it out before the closeted feelings became unbearable for him to keep in.

"I never… got to tell y-you… how much I… l-love you…" Shuri spoke.

He held Mikage's pillow, pretending that it was the young Celestine. He pretended to cry against Mikage's chest, but pretending that Mikage never died and left him just made him cry harder because he knew in his heart that Mikage would never come back.

"Now I never will! You're gone… Mikage…!" He wished that Mikage could hear his voice.

"Dammit… I'm so, so sorry… Mikage…" He wished that Mikage could feel the sincerity in his words.

"I could have… treated you better… I SHOULD have treated you better!" Shuri curled up within the wrinkled sheets with the pillow in between his chest and legs.

"Why did it take me… so long to realize that I love you?" Shuri hugged the pillow closer to his chest.

"Mikage…! Come back…! PLEASE...!" Shuri pounded one of his fists helplessly against the wall he faced next to the bed. He didn't mind the pain in his hand; what he did mind was how much his chest hurt. "Mikage…" Shuri sobbed uncontrollably, saying the young Celestine's name over and over again.

Kokuyou had been standing outside Mikage's room with a box in hand, about to open the door when he heard everything Shuri said. He was not disturbed by the fact that someone of the same gender felt so much love for his younger brother, but was instead touched by Shuri's honest feelings for Mikage. The older Celestine was somewhat aware of Mikage's attraction towards the Oak they served, and felt quite happy that his younger brother's feelings were returned to that extent. He left the box next to the door and walked away quietly, wishing to give the young Oak some space and alone time. He decided to come back at night when he thinks Shuri would go to sleep.

Shuri kept crying for a long time, wetting the pillow with his hot salty tears. He'd clutch at the sheets, seriously wishing that he could hold Mikage's hands. He'd still speak words that he wished Mikage could hear; he uttered apologies and at the same time whispered words of love. This continued up until the evening. It was already dark before he knew it. No one had bothered him all day, which Shuri was thankful for. He crept out of the dark room and shut the door. He turned to walk down the hallway but saw something on the floor.

'_What's this?' _Shuri examined the box outside the door. He sat down beside it.

He opened it and found many of Mikage's belongings that got left behind at the Barsburg Military Academy. Seems like they shipped the stuff back to Oak Manor. Shuri found Mikage's diploma and a fuckload of pictures.

Some of the recent photos featured Mikage and Teito's moments together. There were photos that featured Mikage alone in varying ages. The older photos were of still life, classroom lectures, the occasional hallway brawls, and fighting stances in their basic combat classes. The oldest ones Shuri found were Celestine family pictures, and his and Mikage's pictures together.

Shuri noticed that the pictures with him in them were in a pile separated from the rest of the photos. Most of those Shuri-related pictures were photos from their childhood. Child Shuri smiled so calmly when Child Mikage was present in the picture with him. The recent photos of Shuri looked like they were taken without the young Oak knowing. There was a photo of his serene sleeping face in Officer Lloyd's class, a photo of him walking through one of the academy hallways, and a photo of Shuri smugly smiling as he conversed with his friends at a cafeteria table, among other pictures of him.

"He had pictures of me with him…?" Shuri touched his quivering lips with one hand as he shakily held the photo of his sleeping face in the other hand. "Mikage… did you still love me up until the last moment?" Shuri's voice was still sort of hoarse and feeble from the crying he did all day.

"Shuri-sama?" Kokuyou appeared from around the corner. He honestly thought that Shuri would have retired to bed by that time of the night. Shuri hoped his eyes weren't too puffy for the servant to notice.

Shuri cleared his throat. "I was just looking through this box. They're all Mikage's stuff, right?" Shuri put the photos back into the box, minding that his voice was still croaky.

"Yeah... Shuri-sama, is it okay if you help me put these back in his room? We wish to decorate Mikage's room with all of his favourite photos and mementos." Kokuyou knelt before Shuri with the box in between them.

"But this should only be done by his loved ones. Mikage would have wanted that," Shuri turned up his nose in an attempt to fool Kokuyou into thinking he was okay with them doing it without him.

Kokuyou smiled. "I'm sure Mikage would have wanted you to do it with us, Shuri-sama."

Shuri sat there with his eyes wide, understanding the meaning behind Kokuyou's words. He figured that the man was aware of Mikage's feelings for the young Oak, but just didn't speak of it.

Shuri felt his eyes water and willed himself not to break down and cry again. He nodded furiously, agreeing to help Kokuyou with the decorating. He stood up as Kokuyou retrieved the box.

He opened the door to Mikage's room and switched the light on. Kokuyou followed him in and set the box down next to the bed. Kokuyou glanced at the tear-stained damp pillows and rumpled sheets. He felt like he saw a glimpse of the vast despair Shuri felt at his younger brother's loss.

The next hour was spent talking about Mikage's life through each photo they came across. Kokuyou told many stories about the Celestine family. Shuri would tell him about the fun times he had with Mikage as kids. They both noted how Teito was a good friend of Mikage's. Shuri still felt jealous of the battle sklave's relationship with the young Celestine. Their friendship was something Shuri both coveted and missed.

'_If Mikage were still alive, we could have been the best of friends. More than friends… If he had been willing to take that path with me…' _Shuri sighed.

Kokuyou noticed Shuri sigh. "Would you like me to bring you some lemon tea, Shuri-sama?"

"No, I'm fine. Thank you for your concern, Kokuyou." Shuri tried to smile.

They pinned the pictures to the wall and placed a few of them in picture frames which they mounted on the round table near the bed. Mikage's diploma was rolled up in front of the picture frames. They took the hawkzile model down for cleaning and hung it back in place once they finished.

Shuri excused himself, saying he was tired and needed to rest. Kokuyou nodded and bid him goodnight. Rinka and Kohaku ran past the young Oak and into Mikage's room. As he walked away, he could hear Mikage's younger siblings 'ooh' and 'aah' at the way he and Kokuyou redecorated the place. He walked back to his room with a heavy heart, and an empty stomach whose call he refused to heed.

Shuri didn't feel like eating. He simply stripped down to his boxers and flopped onto his bed face first.

Shuri spent the rest of the night undergoing the three-step cycle of sobbing himself to sleep, dreaming about Mikage and the things they could have done together, and waking up in fright as he continuously woke up to the reality of Mikage's death.

**-chapter 7 end-**

* * *

><p><strong>Naoshiro: <strong>Will you call me a meanie if I tell you that this was my favourite chapter in this entire fic? Well it's not that I actually enjoyed having Shuri suffer the loss of a loved one and friend. Besides, he's not the only one grieving. It honestly made me teary-eyed as I typed down Shuri's message to the deceased Mikage as he cried in the young Celestine's bed.


End file.
